Last week, I discovered that yet another one of my clients had lied about having money with Madoff. Alas, just when I thought I’d uncovered every City crook, another one rears his ugly head (and it is ALWAYS a “he.”)

I got to thinking about the culprits of this crisis and - in retrospect - leaving men in charge of the City was a market disaster waiting to happen.

Historically, City Boys have made the rules, and set the tone. But as the recent financial crisis has demonstrated, their market mazurkas are music to no one’s ears. Men are dragging the City down with them, and very well may be biologically unsuited to be placed at the top echelons of finance. Time and again, they’ve shown that they are not the impartial and reasonable sex they’re made out to be. Male temperament has alarmed the world. Are City Boys too unstable to rule our City?

City Girls I work with are far less obsessed with power and status, in general, and tend to be more thoughtful and ethical than their brothers. In any case, the malfeasance of men always seems to trump the female-feasance of women.

If men would only give up their silly desire for infinite sums of money, the City of London would be a much healthier place. After all, it was the boys who peddled the strange notion of “severance pay,” the twisted idea that executives can fail at a job and still walk off with a $100 million bag of cash. It was men who came up with byzantine scams showing there was no limit to the question, “how much is enough?”

I dreamed about a City without men, a mythological “cult of Athena” banking world where women were in charge and men were just there to fetch us coffee. The boys would be pathetically trying to “snare” us while we gallivanted around Liverpool Street bars, addicted to the “thrill of the chase.” I contend it’s only a matter of time before we will be judging guys on their hourglass figures and culinary abilities. We wouldn’t be forced to attend their stupid rugby matches, or take clients to strip clubs. The world would no longer turn on the whims of a pompous CEO in Canary Wharf, and we end the cycle of economic brutality.

The City with fewer men would be like a woman – soft, silky, with a dash of perfume.

Once City Boys realize that a female-operated City will translate to fewer market crashes and mass redundancies, and that they’re less likely to lose their own jobs every five to seven years, they’ll be happy to give up a little dominance for some Square Mile stability.