It turned very hot and heavy in the City last week – and I’m not talking about the weather.

Normally upon returning from my Mediterranean summer excursion back to the pathetic English summer, it’s as though I’ve walked out of a sauna into an icy plunge pool. But when I saw that my bikini lines were less impressive than our secretary’s - who spent the weekend tanning in Hyde Park – I broke into a small sweat.

As the temperature in the City rises, organizational behaviour changes in interesting ways. You’ll witness an overnight increase in the number of smokers, for instance, who need to leave their desks six times a day to puff under the beating sun. In addition, the need for ties and jackets disappears as bankers’ instinct for survival trumps their instinct for impressing clients: the focus shifts on how to keep breathing (or avoid fainting) on a 37-degree tube.

Unfortunately, any heat-defying methods are rarely institutionalized from the top-down, so it’s necessary to take matters into your own hands. As my friend at Nomura noted, they received a mass email from the management permitting two months of “dress down” (no ties or jackets necessary) while the heat is on – an idea fantastically received by staff – only to have a subsequent email sent saying that they’ve “thought about it,” and “changed their mind” – at which moment, a unanimous groan echoed across the trading floor.

Of course, the urge to kick off so many articles of clothing can only lead to one thing – and we all know what that is. I spotted no fewer than three office rendezvous last week, as these long-simmering romances finally ignited on the hottest week of the year.

It was very naughty of them. We should know better. Most City Boys and Girls are pulled aside early in our careers and given two pieces of advice when it comes to office affairs:

1. Don’t pork the payroll
2. Don’t dip your nib in the company ink

Which, of course, mean exactly the same thing. But with all those late nights and lingering glances between City Boys and Girls, these rules are rarely adhered to. Indeed, there is so much adultery in the City it’s amazing that anyone manages to remain faithful to their significant others after years of rubbing up against that sexy co-worker who knows you better than your partner does – and moreover, understand what a P/E ratio is.

It’s my opinion that – in spite of the heat wave – it’s important to try and keep it neutral, to not mix work and pleasure. But as the City overheats, it’s inevitable that some of us will too.